Freitag, 6. November 2015

(Castaway) Jess: Shipwrecked and Single - part 4




Sul Sul!



Jess here from the Queen Solomon shipwreck. 
Still single. 


But last time, I was asked by chief Manave to choose a date
for the Volcano Festival. 



So I chose...














Timoti. 


Of course. 

I could never get a date with someone like Timoti if I was still back home.




We have fun, and between more stories of his tribe, 
I even manage to get closer to him.


Like, much closer. 







When I return "home" to the Shady Lagoon, 
the others have moved here and turned my wonderful piece of paradise into shit. 


Oh, how I hate this guy!

Whatever, I'm out of here. 
I'll live with the natives. 
Of course, I won't tell them. 
Only that this place will be theirs from now on. 
Hugh finds this funny.



Having told my whereabout to no one but the professor, 
I move in with the natives. 



The place they offer to me seems more than good enough. 

WOW!

This is awesome!



They even brought my raft here.





I shall go see the Shaman. 


Get the idol?
Seems almost too easy. 




Convince jaguar Mata I am friend not food?
Smelling of herbs should help. 


Mata grants me access to the Haunted Village.







I think these haunted spirits need to be put in the right place to rest. 

As reward, they give me the Chief's drum.

Chief Manave is very pleased.

Let's have a Luau!





"Are you woman enough for me, Jess?
Prove it!"

"Drink volcano water!"





It's hot, but bearable. 


"Dance Limbo!"





"You dance Limbo like a woman from our tribe...
but the ultimate test...
will you walk over hot coals for me?"




OUUUUUUCH!!!!



On the second try, I can do it. 










Seems like Timoti and me are in love...







Mittwoch, 9. September 2015

ALMOST REALITY: Cool Taste of Summer (part 3... The ice cream diet)


Sul Sul!



Your host, fat Kirancilla here. 


I've told you I've gained weight after eating too much "Weight of the World" ice cream. And it's not like I was a supermodel before, so to speak. To put things short, I'm the fattest I've ever been and I need a diet. Preferably a tasty one. 



I go to see my sister Michaela for advice. 
How does she manage to keep her wonderful figure, 
having as much tasty treats around her?



"Relax", she says. 
"You need to try the ice cream diet."

Ice cream diet?
Sounds perfect!

She hands me the recipe for 
"Taste of Diet Ice Cream". 





Gotta try this!

It looks almost like "Weight of the World"...
... I'll garnish it with orange slices and top it off with berry sauce. 


 Now that's what I call a delicious diet!



 And an effective one.
I've just had three servings of ice cream, 
but I feel slimmer...

I think I'll have another one. 
 Or two. 

 Or three. 
Can you get fat on diet ice cream?


I fall asleep dreaming about ice cream treats that make you slimmer.

The next morning...


... as I clean the sink after brushing my teeth, 
I think just how lightweight I feel. 

Then my eyes meet the mirror and
- I'm SHOCKED. 


It must be the mirror, I think to myself as I climb into the shower... 
... but this body seems to have gotten sooooo much less than before...



But after I've dressed, it can't be negated anymore. 

I've become almost insanely slim!!!!

On ice cream!!!!



But I look like a stick figure, 

and it just so happens that I prefer my body with a bit more curves. 


And... 

all that ice cream left me yearning for "real" food. 



I'll go have breakfast. 



Later, hunnies. 



Fat Kirancilla will be back soon. Just as fat as I've always used to be.